Recommended for you

by Roxane Hudon

HI THERE INTERNET! How are you? I’m good, a little bit life-confused. I finished school, went on a little trip to refresh my Mind and Spirit, watch sunrises in Bratislava and get drunk with Israeli soldiers (that story for another day and time). I came back, went back to serving coffees, writing movie reviews and complaining about people in general. Same Old. Supposedly, this is Totally Normal, but I’ve been a bit lost, like a puppy. You know, the feeling that you’ve been in school all your life and now it’s ALL ON YOU. NO PRESSURE. My emotions have been higher than usual and for those who know me, that’s fucking scary shit. I threw someone’s forgotten groceries off my balcony in anger and then stared at the milk leaking on the sidewalk and felt really good about it. I cried walking up all the way St-Laurent. Why didn’t I take St-Urbain? Or some street that wasn’t super busy on a Friday night where probably a lot of people I know saw me….I don’t know…I don’t know..This is just one of the questions I ask myself. I’ve returned to my teenage roots. Maybe I’ll download some Live and New Found Glory later. Supposedly, this is Normal Behaviour…according to my friend who spent his post-graduation months locked up in his room, smoking pot on the Internet. He’s a reliable source, I’m sure. So, I’ve started looking for Guidance. WHO AM I AND WHAT DO I WANT TO DO? The only logical thing to do is to stare at my computer screen for a couple of hours, mainly refreshing the “Recommended for You” section on YouTube. Here is what I’ve been shown. THIS IS WHO I AM.

MEMORABLE QUOTES: “The question is: what is the best sex you’ve ever had? And think about it for awhile, maybe it was entirely based on a physical sensation..” TRY WATCHING ALL 4 MINUTES…let me summarize: this girl with striped socks keeps repeating WHAT’S THE, LIKE, BEST SEX, LIKE, YOU’VE EVER HAD for 4 minutes.

Fort Boyard-1994- La Lutte dans la Boue

OBVIOUSLY. this show was genius. …think about it…midgets, tigers, a castle and an old man with a papier mâché face named Pere Fourras. Plus, youtube didn’t pick ANY clip for me, no, it picked the one of two women fighting in mud.

TOP 5 BIGGEST BOMBS

I’M NOT INVENTING THIS. Youtube is telling me THIS IS FOR ME.

Guy with Metal Spikes in his head

??? I don’t know even know what could have lead to this. Hidden fetish?

Population- Renee Dalder

….just watch 15 seconds of this…

Teen Queens of the 50s

a montage of photos of lady stars from the 50s. Keep it coming youtube!

GHETTO KNOWLEDGE – Deep Within

..a fucking creepy song where the singer mainly repeats “deep within….so deep within…deep within”

and LAST BUT NOT LEAST:

this was only 1 of 3 Zelda songs that popped up…

So, what does this mean? What is the purpose of this?….fuck, NOTHING! I’m gonna go throw bread off the balcony. peace.